The Visit...

NiaJean hangs up the phone, walks over to her couch, sits down cross legged and begins typing again…

How do we decide who stays in our lives and who goes?  Is it really our decision or is it the other person?  Do they subconsciously do things so that they can force us to make a decision to let them go?  I don’t know.  Our minds are so powerful that I think we will people in and out of our lives.  We create our own destiny.  It is very true that God gives us choices and based on our choices, we create our reality.  God sees all and knows all but he gives us the power of choice and that includes relationship choices.  Now our family choice is out of our control but I’m talking about people we can choose to have in or out of our lives.  I think God hopes that we make the right decisions and even gives us hints but we’ve got to take heed. 

NiaJean stops typing then looks around the room as she has a conversation with God.  “Please give me a sign.  Did I make the right decision?  This man is in my spirit and I can’t get him out.  Why?  Why do I feel like I shouldn’t have let him go?”  She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath as though she is praying and meditating.

Her doorbell rings, which stops her from her moment of meditation and prayer.  She takes another deep breath and goes to the door to answer it.  When she opens the door Eric is standing there with a bag of goodies in his hand.  “Hey.”  He says as he enters the house and heads to the kitchen.  He sits the bag on the counter and starts taking the items out.  He places a bottle of champagne and a carton of orange juice on the counter, then takes out a pack of red vines, a carton of ice cream, a bag of chips and some salsa.  He places the ice cream in her freezer then takes two glasses from her cabinet and begins making mimosas for the both of them.  He pours the chips in a bowl and opens the red vines and hands her one.  NiaJean is standing in the doorway of the kitchen watching Eric prepare the snacks for them as she munches on the red vine.  Eric picks up both glasses of mimosas and hands her one.  They toast and begin drinking.  NiaJean picks up the package of red vines while Eric picks up the bowl of chips and the container of salsa and they head to the living room to sit on the couch and talk.

Eric can tell by the look on NiaJean’s face that she had been crying so he sips his mimosa in silence for a moment then asks; “Are you ok?”  “Yes, I’m fine.  It seems like all I ever do is cry over some man.”  She says in a frustrated tone.  “Maybe it’s the choices in men.”  He replies.  “Yeah, maybe.”  She answers back.  “Do you need a hug?”  He asks in the most innocent of tones.  She looks at him and smiles then says; “Yes, I could really use one about now.”  He places his mimosa on the table almost spilling it because he becomes a bit nervous for some reason.  He leans over and hugs her and they linger in a tight embrace for what seems minutes but in reality is about five seconds.  Before he lets go, he leans in close to her and kisses her on her lips. 

NiaJean quickly leans back in surprise then says; “Wait, stop.  This is not us.”  Eric becomes frustrated because he’s tired of waiting for her to see what’s right in front of her face then asks;  “Why not?  Why can’t it be us?”  “Eric, you’re my best friend and I want us to remain best friends.”  She replies.  “Best friends make the best lovers.”  Eric says as he tries to convince her that this is the right situation for her.  “Don’t you see my trend with men?  Every time things get a little too serious, it ends.  I don’t want that to happen with you.  Do you get it?  I don’t want to lose you.”  NiaJean says in a very shaky but convincing tone.

NiaJean leans back on the couch and a distraught look is planted on her face as she thinks about the events that took place.  Eric grabs her and pulls her close to him.  He looks into her eyes and says with the utmost sincerity; “NiaJean, I’m not going anywhere.  I’m here for you whether you like it or not, ok.”  NiaJean shakes her head no as she tries to resist his intoxicating stare.  Eric pulls her closer to him and passionately kisses her and she kisses him back.

There is a knock at her door…

Aftermath...

Brooke and NiaJean are sitting at her kitchen table drinking their morning tea and talking.  “Deja’s show was really good last night.”  Brooke says as she pours honey into her tea.  “Yeah I’m proud of her.  She’s so talented.”  NiaJean says with a proud look on her face.  She scoops tea onto her spoon then blows on it before tasting it.  “She’s getting ready to leave to go on tour.”  She says after taking a full sip of her tea.  Brooke looks at NiaJean curiously then asks, “When did this happen?”  “It just happened.  She’s leaving in a couple of weeks I think.  She met up with some people at her show and they offered her an opening spot on their tour so she’s taking it.  They just have to work out all the details.”  NiaJean replies with a sad look on her face.  “Are you ok?”  Brooke asks.  “I’m sad about her leaving but she needs to get out there and do what she loves.”  She says.  “When is she coming back?”  Brooke asks.  “I don’t know.  It might be a couple of months or even longer.”  She says. 

NiaJean gets up from the dining room table and goes to the kitchen.  She comes back with two forks and two small saucers that have pieces of butter pecan cornbread on them.  She places one in front of Brooke and sits down with the other in front of her.  Brooke looks at NiaJean with a huge smile on her face because she loves NiaJean’s cornbread and can’t wait to eat it.  She takes a bite of the cornbread and sits for a moment as she savors every bit of the flavor then asks, “Are you guys doing well with everything else now?”  “Yeah, I still can’t believe she was smoking in my house.”  NiaJean says.  Brooke pauses then asks.  “Wait, but don’t you smoke?”  NiaJean is irritated by Brooke’s question and quickly answers back.  “Brooke, I don’t do it in the house and would never do it around Sage!”  “Yeah, I guess that would be stupid.”  Brooke answers as she digs into her cornbread.  “Very!  I’m thinking about quitting anyway.”  NiaJean replies as she watches Brooke enjoying her tantalizing creation.  Brooke looks up from her almost finished palate satisfying piece of wonder and asks, “Why?”  “I don’t know; it was just one of those moments that opened my eyes to some things I need to change.”  She answers.  “Oh.”  Brooke says as she is at a loss for words.  There is an awkward silence in their conversation so Brooke takes a sip of her tea, finishes her last bite then changes the subject. 

“So what happened to Brian last night?”  She asks.  “He said he had to get up early this morning so he couldn’t come over.”  NiaJean replies.  “You invited him over?”  Brooke asks.  NiaJean hesitates then answers; “Well yes.”  “So much for holding out.”  Brooke says.  “I was holding out.”  NiaJean quickly replies.  “You never told him what you wanted did you?”  She asks.  “No.”  NiaJean answers.  “You and your communication skills have got to get better.  How in the world is this man supposed to know what you want if you don’t tell him?”  Brooke scolds.  “I know Brooke; I was going to talk to him last night.”  She says.  “And give him some?”  She asks.  NiaJean pauses then says, “Maybe.”  “You were!”  Brooke yells as though NiaJean is across the room.  “He’s backing off again.”  NiaJean says with concern in her eyes.  “Well you can’t go back and forth with him, it’s confusing.  You know what you should do?  You should invite him over for dinner and just totally spoil him for the night.”  Brooke suggests.  “Yeah maybe I should.”  NiaJean says with hesitation.  “Maybe?  You should!  And make him some of your world famous butter pecan cornbread.  He’ll be hooked for life.”  Brooke says convincingly.  “Ok, I will.”  She says with confidence and a big smile on her face.  “Look girlie, I have to go.  Brandon and I are going furniture shopping.”  Brooke says then gets up to leave and hugs her.  “Thanks for the tea and the amazing piece of taste bud party.”  They both laugh.  “Love you girl.”  Brooke says.  “Love you too.”  NiaJean says as she hugs Brooke back.  Brooke leaves and

NiaJean picks up her cup and dish off the dining room table and walks to the kitchen and puts them in the sink.  She makes herself another cup of tea then sits back down at the dining room table to drink it while she finishes her piece of cornbread and thinks.

There is a knock at NiaJean’s door which surprises her because she’s not expecting any other company.  She gets up and goes to the front door to answer.  She peeps through the peephole but can’t see who's at her door so she cracks it open.  Jason is standing at the front door smiling.  She is tempted to close the door in his face and walk away but instead she opens the door and lets him in.  They both awkwardly stand in the entryway for a moment.

“Want some coffee or tea?”  She offers as she walks towards the kitchen.  Jason follows her to the kitchen as he answers; “Coffee.  You know how I like it.”  NiaJean goes to the kitchen to make Jason a cup of coffee with three teaspoons of brown sugar and a dash of cream while Jason stands in the doorway of the kitchen and watches her make it.  “Aren’t you going to taste it first?”  He asks as she hands him the cup of coffee.  “I don’t do that anymore, I’m sure it’s how you like it.”  She says as he takes the cup of coffee out of her hand.  NiaJean gets a small saucer out of the cabinet, fork out of the drawer then cuts Jason a piece of cornbread.  She passes him in the doorway holding the bread and fork in hand and sits down at the dining room table.  Jason follows.  She slides his piece of cornbread in front of him then proceeds to finishing her tea and cornbread. 

They sit in silence as they eat and drink.  Jason gulps down his coffee and devours his cornbread in what seems like two seconds then blurts out; “Look Nia, I’m still in love with you.”  NiaJean stops eating and becomes sick to her stomach and words begin to spill out of her mouth.  “You can’t do this to me.  It took a long time to get over you and the minute I’ve moved on and I’m trying to build something with someone else; here you come disrupting my life.  I can’t let that happen Jason.  I’m finally happy again.”  “I know you don’t deserve me coming back in your life after all I did but I’m begging you to just hear me out.”  NiaJean sits in silence as Jason continues.  “You are the best thing that ever happened to me and I want you back for good.  I want to prove to you that I am the man for you without a doubt.”  “Why couldn’t you realize that when you had me?”  She asks.  “I was stupid.  You know how guys are; we don’t realize what’s in front of our face until it’s gone.”  He replies.  “Well, I’m gone and it’s time for you to go.”  She says.  “What?”  He asks with a shocked look on his face.  “Bye Jason.”  She says as she looks directly in his eyes.  “This is not you.”  He says as he grabs her hand.  She looks down at his hand on hers then slowly takes her hand away and sits in silence without looking up at him and repeats her words.  “Bye Jason.”  Jason gets up from the table, stands and stares at her for a moment but she doesn’t respond.  His face is full of pain from the rejection.  “Yeah, alright.”  He says with hurt in his voice.

Jason leaves without saying another word.

NiaJean sits at the kitchen table and tries to take in what just happened as she contemplates her decision.  She clicks the blog app on her phone and begins typing.

We don’t miss people until they’re actually gone.  We take for granted that they’re always going to be there no matter what we do or say but the time comes when they are taken away either by tragedy, circumstance or release.  There’s not a lot we can do about tragedy or circumstance but when we finally decide to release someone from our lives it can feel like the biggest weight has been lifted or like we’ve made the greatest mistake of our lives.  None the less, we must realize that some people are in our lives for a moment and some are in our lives for a lifetime.  The crazy thing about destiny is anyone or anything can always turn out to what we least expect.   

Tears are streaming down NiaJean’s face as she types.  She stops typing then dials.  As soon as the person on the other end answers she says, “Hey are you busy?  Can you come over?”

A Night Out...

NiaJean is standing in the mirror examining herself and what she is wearing.  There are clothes all over her bed that didn’t make the cut for the evening’s “night out” wardrobe and she’s still not sure if she’s satisfied with her wardrobe choice.  She is getting ready to go out to a club to see her sister Deja perform. 

NiaJean’s phone rings and she picks it up.  The voice on the other end starts talking before she even gets a chance to say hello.  “Are we ever going to talk about the other night or are we done with it?”  The familiar voice is Eric on the line as he questions her about their recent sleepover encounter.  “We’re done with it, nothing happen.”  She nonchalantly replies then follows with a question.  “Are you coming tonight?”  “I’ll be there solo.”  He replies.  “Why?  I thought you were bringing someone.  What about the woman you were having breakfast with this morning?”  She asks with a slight tone of curiosity in her voice.  “She was a client.”  He replies with a slight bit of disappointment that she would suggest her.  “Looked like more than that to me.  Anyway, well then bring one of your ratchets but not too ratchet.”  She replies as she cringes at the suggestion.  He smirks then answers, “I’ll see you later on.”  They hang up the phone without saying goodbye.  

Her phone rings again and it’s Yvette from her office so she answers.  “Hey girl, what are you wearing?”  Yvette asks.  “A dress but I might change.”  She answers.  “Cool, I’m getting there early so I can get a cutie pie to buy me some drinks.”  She says.  NiaJean laughs and replies; “Ok.”  “Chow!”  Yvette says and hangs up the phone.  

NiaJean’s phone rings again.  “Hello.”  She answers.  “I don’t have anything to wear.  I’m not going.”  Brooke says with a sound of panic in her voice.  “What?  You have more clothes than most people will ever have in a lifetime!  Find something and come on!  Bye!”  NiaJean hangs up the phone before Brooke has a chance to reply.  

NiaJean’s phone rings for the fourth time and she answer’s before looking at it.

“What?  Get dressed and meet me there!”  NiaJean yells into the phone and gets ready to hang up without realizing it’s not Brooke on the other end.  “Hello?”  He says in a low but seductive tone.  Her heart drops as she recognized the voice on the other end.  She takes a deep breath and slowly sits on the edge of her bed.  “Jason, right now is not a good time.”  She says with a slight edge in her tone.  “You’re too busy to talk to me?”  He asks.  “I’m getting ready to go to Deja’s show.”  She answers.  “Oh she’s performing tonight?  Where?”  He asks.  “At a club where I don’t need to see your face.”  She tensely answers.  “Wow, it’s like that?”  He asks.  “Look I’ve got to go.”  She says as she tries to rush off the phone.  “Can we talk tomorrow?  I really need to share somethings with you.”  He asks.  Her phone is buzzing indicating that there is a call on the other line and this time it’s Brian which makes her anxious and nervous at the same time.  “Really I have to go.”  She says as she begins to hurriedly hang up the phone.  “I’ll stop by tomorrow ok.”  He says.  In her haste to get off the phone she answers Jason.  “Ok!”  Then she quickly switches to answer the other line.

“Hey you, are you on your way?”  She asks in a sexy tone.  “Yeah, I’ll be there in a minute.”  He answers.  “Ok, I’ll be waiting.”  She replies with a sexy smile on her face.  A few minutes later she see Brian arrive so she grabs her purse and rushes out the door.  On their way to the club she gets a text from Jason.  “I’m looking forward to seeing you tomorrow.”  She reads the text but doesn’t answer.

When they arrive at the club Deja is standing out front smiling.  “Hey fam, I’m glad you’re here!”  She hugs her sits and shakes Brian’s hand.  “When do you go on?”  NiaJean asks.  “In about an hour.”  She answers.  “Cool, we’ll be upfront.”  She says.  “There’s a couple of tables reserved for my people so you’re good.”  Deja replies as she lights a joint. 

NiaJean hugs her sister once again then she and Brian head inside.  Deja stands outside for a few more minutes taking in the night air and finishing her joint.  A cute Caucasian girl walks up and smiles at her.  The girl looks familiar but Deja can’t remember where she’s seen her.  “Hello.”  Deja says in a charming tone.  “Solaar right?”  The girl asks.  “That’s me, do I know you?”  She asks.  “We’ve met before.”  The girl says with a sexy smile.  “How could I forget that face?”  Deja says in a flirty tone.  “You shouldn’t have.”  The girl says as she begins walking away while smiling.  Deja follows her with her eyes and says, “I won’t ever again.”  She smiles back at her then follows her inside.

The girl has disappeared in the crowd and right when Deja is getting ready to search for her, the club host informs her that she needs to report to the back to get ready for her performance.

Eric walks in the club with a random female next to him.  He looks around to see if he can find a table.  He spots one that is located near NiaJean and Brian that is marked “reserved” so he drags his date to the table.  Before they sit down he takes his date over to NiaJean’s table.  “Hey.”  Eric says to NiaJean.  “You made it!”  NiaJean says with a little too much excitement.  “We made it.  This is Sabrina.”  Eric says in an uncomfortable tone.  “Hey Sabrina.  Brian, you met Eric earlier today and…so now we meet Sabrina.”  NiaJean says with a bit of sarcasm.

Brian gives Eric a head nod.  “Good to see you again brother…and you too Sabrina.”  Brian says without realizing it’s a different girl from earlier that day.”  “Yeah, you too.”  She says with a confused look on her face.  There is an awkward silence in the midst of all the noise in the club.  Eric and Sabrina are uncomfortably standing over NiaJean and Brian.  “Well we’re going to go sit down.”  Eric says as he tries to break the tension of the scene.  NiaJean forcibly smiles at them and they walk away.  NiaJean finds herself constantly looking in the direction of Eric and Sabrina but tries to be discreet.  Both Brian and Eric notice the constant eye exchange.  Just as the tension builds with the back and forth gazes…Deja appears on stage…